


feeling like we've just begun

by newlovecassette



Category: SuperM (Korea Band)
Genre: (sorta) - Freeform, Birthday Sex, Canon Compliant, Confessions, First Dates, M/M, Porn with Feelings, just two awkward boys in love !
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-26
Updated: 2020-01-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:27:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22410265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newlovecassette/pseuds/newlovecassette
Summary: Baekhyun takes Yukhei out for a birthday dinner—and also, maybe, to figure out what exactly their relationship is to each other.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas
Comments: 6
Kudos: 128





	feeling like we've just begun

**Author's Note:**

> happy birthday xuxi ! its still technically his birthday here im not late what are you talking about  
> i wrote this fic before his actual birthday so if something happens to mess up the timeline of this fic just imagine its an au  
> porn is at the end if that's what you're here for  
> thank you to elle for being my editor, my moral support, and the love of my life <3

Yukhei doesn’t need his birthday to be a special event. He doesn’t need it to be a national holiday, or some great big celebration. He doesn’t even need a  _ party.  _

But he would like some time off. 

However, it seems that SM Entertainment has other plans for him, and when his manager hands him his January schedule, his shoulders slump in defeat. 

_ January 25th — SuperM Tour Rehearsal. _

At least he’ll get to see Baekhyun. 

…

As someone still learning several languages at once, living in a completely foreign country, Yukhei is used to feeling perpetually confused. 

But, when it comes to Baekhyun, his effortlessly charming leader, his senior, Yukhei is more confused than ever. 

Yukhei’s not sure when his  _ feelings  _ for Baekhyun started. 

Was it when Baekhyun had cocked his head, put a hand on his shoulder, and said “You can call me hyung, you know?” 

Was it when Baekhyun started complimenting him on a regular basis? Telling Yukhei how handsome he is, asking to feel his biceps, joking about how tall he is, pinching his cheeks and calling him cute?

Or, maybe, it was when Baekhyun cornered him in the bathroom, and said “You’re just my type, you know?” in that stupid husky voice of his, leaving Yukhei confused, face flushed pink.

Maybe, it was in L.A, when Baekhyun came into his room, asked for a kiss, and Yukhei found it so easy to give him just what he asked for, to give him everything he needed. Kissing Baekhyun is easy, especially when he’s so beautiful, when his lips meet Yukhei’s so perfectly. Baekhyun’s just so  _ good  _ at it. 

So, was it when the kissing easily spiraled into sex, into Baekhyun in his hotel bed every night, in his shower, between his legs?

The problem is that Yukhei doesn’t know at all, and deep down, he thinks he might have had  _ feelings  _ for Baekhyun since the very beginning. Yet, Baekhyun might not have feelings for Yukhei at all. In fact, after spending every night on tour together, they’ve barely talked. Now that they’re back together, practicing, Baekhyun is being his usual goofy, teasing self—but not the teasing Yukhei craves, not the kind where he runs hands along Yukhei’s broad shoulders or whispers innuendoes in his ear. Just normal. Like it was before the tour. 

_ Perhaps _ , Yukhei thinks,  _ that’s for the better _ . He pushes everything to the back of his mind, and tries to focus on being “normal”. It’s not like they were ever dating. They were just… intimate. And Baekhyun’s not really one for labels, seems to just enjoy just fooling around, and Yukhei can accept that. 

Perhaps, Baekhyun was just another brief hookup—Yukhei’s had those before, small flings, with girls back home, with other trainees, with Ten even, and he got over all of them—but with Baekhyun, it’s more complicated.

Yukhei never had feelings for those other people.

But he has feelings for Baekhyun. And he can’t seem to shake them.

…

Yukhei’s actual birthday hits him by surprise, partially because he’s been so tired and stressed lately, that he didn’t even notice it coming.

Ten wakes him up at 6 AM, softly shaking him awake from his bed. 

“Happy birthday, Xuxi,” he whispers. 

Yukhei rubs his eyes, sitting up slowly. “Ten,” he whines, “It’s too early.”

“We have rehearsal,” Ten says, pinching Yukhei’s cheeks. “I know it’s your birthday, I’m sorry.”

Yukhei grumbles and whines, but he forces himself out of bed and into clothes nonetheless. Ten makes him breakfast, arguing that it’s the least he can do for the birthday boy. The other members aren’t even up yet, so it’s just the two of them in the kitchen, Ten humming to himself and Yukhei quietly on his phone. 

He gets a Kakaotalk message from Mark.

_ Happy birthday! ✨💕🎉 See you at practice! _

He wonders, desperately, if Baekhyun will wish him a happy birthday too. 

It turns out that  _ everyone _ wishes him a happy birthday.

Taemin gives him a congratulatory pat on the shoulder. Mark hugs him with unbridled enthusiasm. Taeyong follows with a far less intimate high-five. Jongin, surprisingly, also hugs him, something that the fanboy in Yukhei practically dies at. Yukhei’s surprised they all remembered, but there’s also a chance Ten messaged them all demanding they tell him happy birthday. Either way, he’ll take it. 

Most surprising, somehow, is Baekhyun, who grabs Yukhei by the wrist with his little nimble fingers during a break, and drags him to the corner of the practice room. 

Baekhyun looks up at him, looking all serious, like he’s putting a lot of thought into what he’s about to say, then asks, “Are you free this evening?” 

Yukhei blinks at him, confused. “I think… Why? It’s my bir—”

“I know you’re free,” Baekhyun interrupts, his little hand still not letting go of Yukhei’s wrist. “I already arranged it with your manager.”

“I—Really? But—why?” Yukhei stutters, feeling absolutely perplexed. Why is Baekhyun acting like this now, after being mostly mute towards Yukhei for so long? 

Baekhyun stares at him, determined. “You and me. We’re going out tonight. A celebratory dinner.”

“We are?” Yukhei says, confused, mouth hanging open in surprise.

“We are. Dress up, it was hard to get this reservation, so you better look nice.” Baekhyun rubs his thumb against Yukhei’s wrist-bone, and there’s something about it that’s so comfortingly tender. “I’m picking you up from your dorm at 6:00. Be ready, I don’t like to be left waiting.”

Yukhei finds that words aren’t really escaping him, because he’s so stunned. He finally musters up something, and then asks in a squeaky voice, “Is this a…. date?”

Baekhyun avoids eye contact, and shrugs nonchalantly. “If you want it to be.” Biting his lip, he squeezes Yukhei’s wrist, and meets his eyes one more time. “And, uh… Happy birthday, by the way.” 

For the rest of rehearsal, Yukhei’s head is spinning so much that he can barely focus on the choreography, stumbling over his own feet. Baekhyun asked him on a  _ date.  _ A date, for just the two of them. The closest thing they’ve ever had to a date was splitting a bag of Skittles on Yukhei’s Atlanta hotel room bed and watching Jeopardy (post-coitus). 

The second practice is over, he runs to Ten’s side. “Baekhyun asked me on a date,” he sputters frantically in Mandarin. “What do I do? He told me to dress up. What does that mean? Like a suit? I don’t own one of those!” 

Ten raises his eyebrows. “Huh.”

Yukhei shakes Ten’s shoulders. “That’s not what you say to me when I tell you  _ EXO’s Baekhyun  _ just asked me on a date!! On my birthday!!” 

“I mean, you two were boning already, weren’t you?”

“This is more than… boning! It’s a  _ date _ !” Yukhei practically shouts, and as if on cue, Baekhyun exits the practice room, and walks into the hallway where they’re standing. Lucas freezes, hands still gripping Ten’s shoulders.

Baekhyun cocks his head. “Nice work today, kids. Xuxi, see you tonight?” He waves, and starts to head down the hall.

“Y...Yes. Tonight. See you,” Yukhei half-yells, trying to keep his voice from cracking.

“Oh my God,” Ten whispers. “He called you Xuxi. Your  _ mom  _ calls you that. Does he call you that in bed?”   
“Can you shut up? I need help with my  _ date _ ,” Yukhei whispers in return, trying to not watch the way Baekhyun saunters down the hall.    
“I suppose I can help you pick an outfit. Consider it a birthday present,” Ten says with a grin, and he pats Yukhei on the cheek. “Stop stressing out about it. It’s gonna be fine.”

…

“Are you sure about this?” Yukhei asks, studying himself in the mirror. Ten has dressed him up in a pink sweater, over a button-down. “I feel so… homely.”

“You don’t get my vision. I’m going for a like, meet-the-parents vibe.” Ten adjusts the collar, and pats Yukhei on his non-existent ass. 

“I’m not meeting anyone’s parents.” 

“Yeah, but knowing Baekhyun, he likes how innocent and cute you are. You look so precious. And see, you still have all your piercings in. It’s a little bit  _ edgy _ , yet still loveable.” 

“Okay, I trust you—Ahh!” Yukhei jumps back as Ten starts spritzing him with liquid. “Stop it!”

“It’s perfume, you dingus. You’ll smell good. Don’t you want to smell good?” He sprays him again.

“Yes…” Yukhei pouts, and he stands still, letting Ten fuss over him. Ten ruffles a hand through Yukhei’s hair, and smoothes out the creases in his collar, admiring his handiwork. 

“Look at you!” Ten exclaims. “My little Xuxi, all grown up. Going on a date! About to get the first ass of his 21st year!”

“Hey,” Yukhei warns, “Me getting ass is not a guarantee.”

“Remember—” Ten starts, but Yukhei interrupts. 

“Use a condom, I know.”

“That’s my boy.” Ten pats his chest, and right as he does, the doorbell rings, and the two of them turn. 

“I’ll get it,” Ten says. Yukhei scrambles back to his room to grab his jacket and his phone, bumping into Yangyang in the hall. 

“Nice date fit, dude,” Yangyang says with a whistle. 

“Thanks,” Yukhei says, and he hears Ten say ‘Come on in, Baekhyun-hyung!’ and a bit of panic settles in his stomach. Baekhyun’s in his  _ dorm,  _ where he  _ lives.  _ Is it clean enough? Is it to his tastes? Did he leave out anything embarrassing in the living room? It doesn’t even matter at this point, because Baekhyun is already here—pretty obviously landmarked by Xiaojun’s shout of “ _ Baekhyun-sunbaenim!? _ ” from the other room. Yukhei takes one deep breath and a last peak in the mirror, before standing up straight and heading into the living room. 

Half the members are there—Kun, flustered at the sudden very important guest, is offering Baekhyun a glass of water, and Xiaojun is nervously asking for a signature on his copy of City Lights. Yangyang is observing from the couch, and Ten is just sort of standing there, smug smile on his face.

Yukhei doesn’t really care about any of them, though, because the first person his eyes go to is Baekhyun, who’s just standing in the middle of it all, cordially talking with Xiaojun, who seems completely awestruck. Baekhyun’s all dressed up, tight-fitting slacks and polished shoes, hair styled and swept up out of his eyes. He’s got on a striped shirt with several buttons undone, a suit jacket on top. He looks dashingly handsome, like the celebrity version of Byun Baekhyun that Yukhei’s used to seeing in Naver articles or at press conferences, yet here he is, standing right in the middle of Yukhei’s home, surrounded by Yukhei’s closest friends. 

When Yukhei steps into the room, Baekhyun looks up, and his eyes meet Yukhei’s. 

“Hey,” Yukhei says, trying not to sound like he’s absolutely awestruck by Baekhyun’s entire existence.

Baekhyun just smiles at him. “Hey there, Yukhei.” He finishes signing Xiaojun’s album, and hands it back to him, all without breaking eye contact. Something about him seems a lot more suave and put together than he was previously, when he was awkwardly trying to ask Yukhei out, but Baekhyun’s always been impossible to read anyway. It’s part of his charm, Yukhei supposes. “Are you ready to go?” Baekhyun continues, and he cocks his head as if to gesture outside, and there’s something about it that’s strangely super attractive, and wow, Yukhei is really about to go on a date with fucking  _ Byun Baekhyun _ , and his heart has never raced this fast in his life.

Yukhei forgets to respond for a few seconds, so Ten butts in. “He is.”

“I am,” Yukhei reassures. “Are… Do you have a driver?”

Baekhyun shakes his head. “Just myself. Came here in my Audi.” 

“An Audi! Wow!” Yangyang exclaims, and Kun shoots him a glare.

“Okay then… um…” Yukhei pats his back pockets to make sure he has everything. “I’m ready to go, then.”

“Alright.” Baekhyun turns to each of the WayV members present around him, and gives them all polite nods. “Very nice meeting you all. I promise I’ll take good care of him.”

“You better,” Ten says, and his tone is humorous, but honestly, Yukhei knows he means it. 

Yukhei awkwardly shuffles out the door, followed by Baekhyun, Kun yelling well-wishes at them and Ten blowing kisses. As soon as the door is closed, Baekhyun turns to Yukhei.

“I like your outfit,” he says, eyes dragging all the way up Yukhei’s lengthy legs and across his chest. “Very cute.”

Yukhei fiddles with the sleeve of his shirt, tugging it out from under the sweater. “Ah, thanks. Ten helped me.”   
“Car’s this way, come on,” Baekhyun says, gesturing for Yukhei to follow him. They walk down the sidewalk until they reach a black Audi, sitting pristinely in the evening light. It looks all fancy and sleek, like a car that really belongs to a genuine  _ celebrity.  _ Which it does—and said genuine celebrity is about to drive him to a date in his beautiful fancy car. It feels so surreal, and it really shouldn’t, because he’s had sex with Baekhyun, touched him in some of the most intimate ways possible, but he still feels so nervous about going on a  _ date  _ with him. Sometimes, everything with Baekhyun feels ridiculously backwards, all jumbled up, but it’s worth it for him, Yukhei thinks.

Baekhyun unlocks the doors with a click of his car keys, and he walks around to the passenger side, swinging the door open. “Come on in,” he says. “Don’t want to be late, do we?”

Yukhei feels especially strange about Baekhyun holding the door open for him like a chauffeur, like  _ he  _ should be the one ushering Baekhyun in instead, but he pushes that to the back of his mind and slides into the leather seat. Baekhyun walks back around, and pulls into the driver’s seat. Despite how small he is, he looks sort of commanding behind the wheel. 

“Hyung…” Yukhei says, voice quiet as Baekhyun slams the door shut, “Why?”   
“Why what?” Baekhyun jams his keys in the ignition, and when he looks at Yukhei, Yukhei can swear there’s just the tiniest bit of worry in his eyes. 

“Why are you taking me out? On my birthday? On a date?”

“I never  _ said  _ it was a date. It’s a birthday celebration. I’m a senior treating his junior.” Baekhyun starts to back his car out of his parking spot, and Yukhei’s heart falls as his words sink in. It probably shows on his face, because Baekhyun looks suddenly panicked. “I mean—fuck. God, sorry. I’m bad at this. It’s a date—if you want it to be, I mean. Sorry, I’ve just never done this before, really. At least, I haven’t for a while.” Baekhyun suddenly sounds so terrified, his earlier cool demeanor completely gone.

“I want it to be a date!” Yukhei blurts out, feeling how his face heats up. He grips at his knees, trying to watch out the window instead of looking at Baekhyun’s face, but he still finds himself gazing at it in the reflection. “I really do. I—I like you a lot, hyung.” 

“Good. I’m glad.” Baekhyun makes his lips a thin line, eyes on the road. “I...I want it to be a date too.” He looks over at Yukhei, and he smiles, warm and comforting, and Yukhei finds his face breaking into a grin of his own. 

It’s strange, because this is the first time they’ve been alone together since November. The last time it was just the two of them, it was late at night in a dark New York City hotel room, Baekhyun demanding that Yukhei give it to him hard and fast, and Yukhei complying, because he’s always willing to give Baekhyun everything he asks for. They’d even showered together, just the two of them, and Yukhei had thought, for a second, that there was a chance that this  _ thing  _ between them could be more than that, something special. And yet, now, Baekhyun can barely admit he’s taking Yukhei on a date. He’s such a strange man, but Yukhei feels like every second he spends with him, he falls even more hopelessly in love. 

It’s quiet in the car for a few minutes as Baekhyun drives. Yukhei watches Baekhyun’s hands resting on the wheel, how his rings glint in the passing light, and stares at his pretty side profile, the way his face looks when focusing on the road. Baekhyun’s impossibly beautiful, in every way possible. Yukhei feels pretty lucky, to have him in any capacity at all, that Baekhyun even lets Yukhei touch him, look at him. 

“You’re staring,” Baekhyun remarks, side-eyeing Yukhei as he turns around a corner.

“You just look nice.” Yukhei rests his hands in his lap, playing with the rings on his own fingers. “You always do.”   
Baekhyun pouts. “It’s  _ your  _ birthday, not mine. I should be the one complimenting you.” He pauses, slowing the car and looking out the window. “Looks like we’re here.” 

Yukhei takes a look for himself. It’s a fancy restaurant that he doesn’t recognize, but it’s not like he spends a lot of time at fancy restaurants anyway. When he and the members go out, it’s usually for something cheap. 

“Hyung…” Yukhei pauses, creasing his eyebrows together in thought. “Won’t someone see us? At a restaurant like this?” 

Baekhyun pulls the car up to the sidewalk, and he turns to Yukhei, licking his lips. (Baekhyun’s habit of licking his lips is perhaps one of the most dastardly things for Yukhei’s mental stability. And his dick. But that’s a talk for another day.) “Don’t worry,” he says, voice sly. “I took care of it.”

Yukhei’s eyes widen. “Like… What do you mean? You didn’t  _ kill  _ someone, did you?”

Baekhyun bursts into laughter. “Oh my God, no! Jesus. I have  _ money.  _ I don’t need to  _ kill _ anyone. I like you a lot, but not  _ that  _ much.” He swings open the car door and gets out. 

“You  _ like  _ me…?” Yukhei whispers as Baekhyun walks around the front of the car to unlock Yukhei’s door. He opens it and gestures at Yukhei expectantly. It’s cold out, a chilly breeze dancing through the air, and Yukhei can’t tell if the flush on Baekhyun’s cheeks is from the temperature or not. 

Yukhei quickly scrambles out of his seat, careful not to hit his head on the roof of the car (he’s done it before). He looks through the dimly lit windows of the restaurant—and can’t make out any presence of people inside. Odd. 

Without warning, Baekhyun hooks his arm in Yukhei’s, and tugs at him. “Stop just standing there,” he whines. “Can we go inside? I’m cold.”

“I don’t know, hyung. You’re the one that planned this. You decide,” Yukhei says, and he grins at Baekhyun, who wrinkles his nose in response. He wraps a hand around Yukhei’s arm, and tugs at it, hard, leading Yukhei towards the door to the restaurant. Yukhei easily follows. Despite Yukhei’s size and strength, Baekhyun’s always been able to drag him around without trouble—Yukhei’s not sure if that speaks to Baekhyun’s hidden strength or Yukhei’s weakness when it comes to Baekhyun. He’ll figure it out with time. (If Baekhyun is willing to give him that.)

“Don’t mind the sign,” Baekhyun remarks. Yukhei realizes that on the door there’s a sign hanging that reads ‘CLOSED’. He turns to Baekhyun to protest, but Baekhyun pushes inside anyway. 

It’s a really, really nice restaurant—that’s the first thing Yukhei thinks. The kind he only visits when Lee Sooman is about to tell him big news. It’s got a hostess, who’s waiting by the entrance with a patient smile on her face, and when she sees Baekhyun, she bows. 

“Mr. Byun,” she remarks, and she spares a quick glance in Yukhei’s direction. “Welcome.” There’s ambient jazz music playing, and Yukhei realizes he can hear it so clearly because there’s none of the usual restaurant noises in the atmosphere—no utensils clinking, or people chattering, just silence. He looks at Baekhyun, feeling more confused by the second.

“Baekhyun—” he whispers, “Did you—”

“Are you two ready to head to your table?” the waitress interrupts. 

Baekhyun squeezes Yukhei’s arm. “We are.” 

There’s a wall blocking the view of the rest of the restaurant, but as the waitress picks up two menus and starts to walk them to their table, Yukhei realizes. 

The entire restaurant is silent, because there’s no other customers. There’s not a sign of a single patron. Every table and chair is empty. Somehow, Baekhyun has managed to get the whole restaurant to just him and Yukhei.

Baekhyun smiles at Yukhei, little fingers still digging into his arm. “See?” he says. “No one to bother us.”

Yukhei finds that any possible responses seem to be caught in his throat, but somehow, he manages to stumble out a choked “Hyung—you didn’t have to— _ how _ ?” 

“It’s not a big deal,” Baekhyun scoffs, even though it very clearly is. How much money does it even cost to rent out an entire  _ restaurant,  _ let alone a high-class establishment like this? It’s impossible to fathom. “I just wanted to be alone with you.” 

As Yukhei tries to comprehend why he’d ever be worth that much effort or money, the waitress leads them to a two-person table at the very back of the restaurant. It’s a picturesque romantic setup—candles glowing all soft, a bouquet of roses, white linen tablecloth. She pulls out their chairs, inviting the two of them to sit. 

“Thanks,” Yukhei says, but it comes out sort of squeaky, because he’s starting to realize he’s never done anything like this before, and he’s really hoping it’s not one of those fancy places with the five different kinds of forks that he never knows how to properly use. He sits down, tucking his legs under the table carefully, and watches Baekhyun sit across from him. 

He notices that against Baekhyun’s chest sits his usual favorite gold chain. Baekhyun doesn’t seem to favor accessories that much, but he always has that chain on—Yukhei has vivid memories of helping fasten it around Baekhyun’s neck. It looks nice against the bare skin, something Baekhyun doesn’t show often, because he’s usually prone to covering himself up in baggy clothes. 

(Not that Yukhei doesn’t think Baekhyun can look good in anything. It’s just that seeing him a little more exposed in public... it’s different, exciting in a sense.)

The waitress sets two menus down on the table. “I’ll leave you to it,” she says, and Baekhyun gives her a polite nod. 

Yukhei opens the menu, not really reading anything, because he’s too busy peeking at Baekhyun, the way his brows furrow in thought as he looks at the wine list, like he’s  _ really  _ thinking about it.    
“Do you take a lot of people here?” Yukhei asks. 

Baekhyun looks up from the wine list at him, confused. “What do you mean, take people here?”

“Like, on dates,” Yukhei responds. The word ‘date’ still feels weird to say, especially in the context of Baekhyun, but it’s starting to grow on him. 

Baekhyun tugs at one of the leaves on the bouquet of roses, avoiding Yukhei’s eyes. “Like I said, I don’t really do dates at all. I’m not really… the committing type.”   
“Not even to one date?” Yukhei tests. 

“I’m busy. I can’t put that time into someone unless they’re… special.” There’s a tentative-ness in his tone, his facial expression unreadable, like he’s trying to find a way to express how he’s feeling to Yukhei, but he can’t get it quite right. 

“Oh,” Yukhei says, slowly doing the math of what Baekhyun’s saying. “So, you mean you think I’m…”

A voice cuts into their conversation, leaving Yukhei hanging. “Do you two want anything to drink?” It’s the waitress, and Baekhyun looks positively relieved to see her. 

Yukhei quickly flips to the back of the menu, and looks at Baekhyun, panicked. “I don’t know!” he exclaims, and Baekhyun chuckles. 

“It’s your birthday. You get what you want.” Baekhyun smiles at him, seemingly endeared by Yukhei’s panic over having to make a  _ decision.  _

“I don’t even know what I want. You decide,” Yukhei says firmly.

“Do you like wine?” asks Baekhyun. 

“I mean… If you like it, I’ll like it. Or I’ll try,” Yukhei replies, trying not to make a face, mind drifting back to all the terrible wines he’s had to drink at dinners with executives. 

“Okay.” Baekhyun turns to look up at the waitress. “We’ll have one bottle of the Gewürztraminer, then.” 

Yukhei blinks. “The  _ what _ ?”   
“The Gewürztraminer. It’s a wine. It’s my favorite,” Baekhyun says, and a smile spreads across his face. “You’re cute.” He reaches across the table, and pinches Yukhei’s cheek, a habit he picked up at some point during their debut preparations that he can’t seem to let go.

“I know it’s a wine!” Yukhei groans, blush spreading across his face. “Geez.”

“It’s sweet. You’ll like it. Maybe. You asked me to choose.” Baekhyun taps his fingers against the table, and he’s blushing a little too, biting his bottom lip.    
“If you like it, I’ll like it,” rushes out Yukhei, perhaps a little too eagerly, because Baekhyun laughs again. 

“Hm.” Baekhyun grins to himself. “Okay, then. Good to know.” 

It’s quiet for a few minutes, their only accompaniment the ambient music playing all around them, and the sound of Baekhyun’s shoe squeaking against the floor—he’s shaking his leg under the table. Yukhei realizes, Baekhyun is probably super nervous, a lot more nervous than he’s letting on. He thinks about what Baekhyun had said before they were interrupted, about how he doesn’t commit to anything like this unless the person is  _ special.  _ Therefore, Yukhei is  _ special  _ to Baekhyun, and that makes his heart bloom—maybe there really is a possibility of mutual feelings, of a Thing with a capital ‘T’ between them. 

The waitress returns with the wine, pouring them each a glass, and takes their orders, Baekhyun getting some sort of pasta dish, and Yukhei a steak. She takes the menus, and therefore, they’ve got nothing to look at but each other.

Baekhyun breaks the silence instantly, reaching inside his suit jacket for something. 

“I have something for you. I was going to save it for dessert, but I can’t really wait, so here.” He slides a flat black box across the table. It’s wrapped in a tiny white satin bow, with a tag hanging off that reads “ _ Happy Birthday, Xuxi!”  _ with a tiny heart drawn in pink gel pen. 

Yukhei picks up the box, but tentatively. “This is… for me?” he says slowly.

“Yes, idiot. It’s your birthday, so I got you a gift. Don’t overthink it,” Baekhyun huffs. “C’mon. Open it, please.” He leans in, expectantly, wringing his hands in his lap. 

Carefully, Yukhei unwraps the little ribbon, trying to be gentle despite his clumsily large fingers. His heart is beating in his chest, strangely enough, like this is a truly exciting event. Being an idol, Yukhei gets a lot of gifts, from fans, from brand executives, from coworkers, so it shouldn’t be a big deal. But it’s from Baekhyun, who is currently watching him lift the lid off the box with an intent in his eyes Yukhei usually only sees when he’s trying to memorize choreography. 

Inside the box sits a necklace, a necklace Yukhei instantly recognizes, because it’s the same one Baekhyun currently has around his neck. A plain gold chain. 

“Wow,” Yukhei breathes out. “Is it the same—”   
“It’s the same as mine,” Baekhyun finishes. One of his hands flies to the chain around his own neck, and he starts to fiddle with it between his fingers. “If you don’t like it, I can take it back, and get something else—”

“No,” Yukhei interrupts. “I like it. I like it  _ a lot. _ ” He lifts it out of the box, and the gold glints in the candlelight. “You didn’t have to. Thank you, hyung.”

“I just thought…” Baekhyun pauses, watching the necklace in Yukhei’s hand, then glancing back down at his own, “I thought that since we spend a lot of time apart, you know… that I should get you something to remind you of me. To connect us, in a way, I guess.” He picks up his untouched wine glass, taking a sip, and thinking to himself. “Sorry. It’s stupid and corny. God. I’m becoming such a sap as I get older.” 

Yukhei can’t help it—the moment Baekhyun mentions ‘something to remind you of me’, he feels tears start to well up in his eyes. It’s ridiculous. He’s not usually this much of a crybaby, but there’s something about this, right here, right now, that’s so  _ special.  _

Baekhyun sort of stormed into Yukhei’s life, like a tornado kicking up all this extra emotion and strange, new feelings and experiences, and he would’ve been fine with that—with Baekhyun being a raging storm that turned his life upside down, and left him with an entirely different view of the world. But, right now, just the two of them, in this restaurant, it’s like all the endless winds surrounding Baekhyun have calmed, and he might be here to stay, at least for a little while.

So, yes, Yukhei feels a couple tears trickling down his cheeks when he holds the necklace in his hand. 

“Are you  _ crying _ ?” Baekhyun gasps, leaning across the table in concern. “Oh my God, are you okay, I’m sorry, maybe this is too much too fast, listen, we can just forget this—” 

“No,” Yukhei whimpers, “No, I’m just crying because it’s perfect, and I’m really happy. And I like you a lot.” 

Baekhyun pulls himself back. “Oh,” he says. “I—um—I like you a lot too. Are you sure you’re okay?”

Yukhei rubs his eyes with his sweater sleeve. “Yeah. They’re just happy tears.” 

“Crying over a stupid necklace. You really are a giant baby,” Baekhyun says, some of his usual snarkiness returning to his voice. He smiles with pride, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms.

“It’s not stupid!” Yukhei exclaims. “It’s beautiful, and it means so much to me!” His fingers fiddle with the clasp, and cautiously, he clips it around his neck, still sniffling as he does. 

Baekhyun clicks his tongue, reaching out an arm across the table again. “Here. If you’re going to wear it, at least wear it properly.” He tucks the chain under the collar of Yukhei’s shirt, and Yukhei finds his face heating up when Baekhyun’s fingers brush his neck. “It looks good on you,” Baekhyun mutters, mostly to himself. 

“Thank you so much,” Yukhei says, and he wipes away the last of his tears with the fancy linen napkin that’s on the table (perhaps not proper etiquette, but who cares).

“You’re welcome. It’s the least I can do.” Baekhyun sips on his wine again, taking a deep breath, like he’s really preparing for something. “Listen, Yukhei… About what I said earlier—about only taking people on dates if they’re special.”

Yukhei can instantly feel his heart tightening in his chest. “Yeah?”

“It’s because…” Baekhyun winces, as if he’s really struggling. He might be. Baekhyun has a hard time admitting his own feelings. Even if Yukhei hasn’t known him for too long, it isn’t hard to tell. When Yukhei had grabbed Baekhyun backstage in D.C., kissed him and told him he liked him, a lot, Baekhyun had frozen up like a stalling computer at capacity. (“I don’t think I can handle that,” was all he’d said, and they’d left it at that.) “You are special to me, Yukhei,” Baekhyun blurts out. “I mean, I initially just wanted to take you to do something special for your birthday, because I knew you were feeling down about it, and I wanted to be a good leader, but—we’ve had this _ thing _ , you know. The sex. So it complicates things.” 

“Right,” Yukhei says, slowly, because he’s a little confused. He watches as Baekhyun takes a piece of bread from the bread basket, and starts to rip it to pieces with his fingers, trying to collect his thoughts. “What are you trying to say, hyung?” Yukhei persists, because he really thinks whatever Baekhyun’s trying to say could go either fantastic or horribly wrong, in the case of Yukhei’s mental wellbeing, and his own  _ feelings  _ issue. “If, um, if you just want this to be, like, just a sex thing, that’s okay—” 

“I don’t want this just to be a sex thing!” Baekhyun yelps, and he slaps a hand over his own mouth, as if surprised at his own words. 

“Oh.” Yukhei’s eyebrows raise. 

“Listen,” Baekhyun says, and a bit of determination gleams in his eyes. His leg is shaking even faster under the table. “I like you, Yukhei. I mean, I like you physically, how you look, whatever. That’s what made me want to fuck you in the first place, because you’re super hot, and super hot boys are always my goddamn weakness, but you’ve just—I don’t know how you did it, but I like you, in the non-wanting to suck your dick way. In the hand-holdy way. In the mushy-gushy way, with all the feelings. It’s been a long time since I’ve ever felt this way about anyone, Xuxi.” He’s still staring at his own hands, unable to meet Yukhei’s eyes. “I… After the tour, I had a talk with Jongin, and he said that he could tell how much I liked you, and that I needed to man up and do something about it. So here I am, doing something about it.” A pause, and he inhales. “I like you, Wong Yukhei. I want to do stuff with you like this forever. Dates, and shit. Not just sex. Commitment. As not just your leader, or your senior, or your friend. As whatever you want me to be, need me to be,” Baekhyun rambles out, talking fast, and he lets out a giant breath of relief when he finishes. His face is burning bright red, and he scrunches his nose, still pointedly avoiding eye contact. 

Yukhei opens his mouth to say something, but finds that the proper words are lost to him, no matter the language he’s speaking, and so he sits there, mouth hanging open like a fish. 

It takes him a few seconds, but finally, he squeaks out “You have feelings for me?”

“Yes. Shut up. It’s embarrassing,” Baekhyun grumbles. 

“I have feelings for you too!” Yukhei practically shouts, scrambling forward across the table so he can take Baekhyun’s hands in his, almost knocking his untouched wine glass over. He’s so excited that his heart feels like it’s trying to escape out of his throat. “Hyung, I like you so much. I’ve liked you since I met you. Since before we started… you know.”    
Finally, Baekhyun meets his eyes. “Really?” he says, like he can’t believe that anyone could like him. Like he’s not Baekhyun, instantly charming and lovable Baekhyun, who’s had Yukhei’s heart in his hands for the past year. 

“I think I’m in love with you,” Yukhei says, honestly, and he rubs his thumbs across Baekhyun’s knuckles. 

“Oh. Wow.” Baekhyun laughs, dazed, and his face breaks into a bright smile. “Okay, I don’t know if I’m there, quite yet, but… I want to be, I think.” He looks down at where Yukhei’s gripping his hands. “You can let go of my hands, you know.”

“I don’t want to. I like your hands,” Yukhei says, without thinking, but it just makes Baekhyun smile even more.

“Fair enough.” They hear footsteps, and both turn to see the waitress approaching with their food. “Let’s eat,” Baekhyun says, “And we’ll figure out all the logistics of  _ this _ later.”

…

  
  


They’re sitting in the car, after a successful, pleasant dinner. They’d had regular conversation, about worries for the tour, telling fun stories about what happened while they were apart, Baekhyun teaching Yukhei new Korean words and Yukhei teaching him some words in Chinese—it was just like a regular date. But now, they’re here, in the car, and the problem is—Yukhei doesn’t want the night to end, but he’s not sure how to ask. 

It turns out, Baekhyun does it for him. 

“Yukhei,” he says, clicking his seatbelt in, “If you want me to drive you home, I can do that.” He drums his fingers along the wheel, car still not started. “But… if you wanted to come over to my place, you know, come up for  _ coffee… _ ” Baekhyun looks at Yukhei, expectantly.

Yukhei creases his eyebrows together, confused. “Didn’t we already have coffee with desert?”   
Baekhyun slaps his shoulder with a little hand. “Dummy. I’m asking if you want to come to my apartment and  _ fuck me. _ ”

“Oh.” Yukhei’s eyes widen. “ _ Oh.  _ Yes! Yes I do!” he exclaims, perhaps a little too eagerly, but really, if Baekhyun presents him with the opportunity to fuck him, of course he’s going to follow through. He’s a simple man. 

“Thank God,” Baekhyun gasps, and he starts the car instantly, revving on the gas like he’s got somewhere to be. “I mean, it would’ve been fine if you said no, but I haven’t gotten any since November.”

“Me either,” blurts out Yukhei, thinking sorrowfully of all the December nights he spent sadly jacking off. 

“Well,” Baekhyun says, “Now that we’re boyfriends, hopefully that dick of yours will see a little more action than your own hand.” He lets this slip out so casually, busy focusing on the road, that Yukhei doesn’t even notice what he says at first.

“We’re  _ boyfriends _ ?” Yukhei says, stunned. “I’m your  _ boyfriend? _ ”

“I mean, yeah,” Baekhyun shrugs, tongue sticking out between his lips a little as he focuses on driving. “If you’re cool with it.”   
“I’m very cool with it,” Yukhei whispers, and he puts a hand on Baekhyun’s thigh and squeezes. “Wow,” he remarks, mostly to himself. “My  _ boyfriend  _ is EXO’s Baekhyun,”

Baekhyun just laughs at him, endeared, and for the rest of the drive to Baekhyun’s apartment, Yukhei won’t let go of his leg, nor can he stop smiling. Baekhyun is his  _ boyfriend.  _

It doesn’t take too long to reach Baekhyun’s apartment. He lives in exactly the kind of place Yukhei imagines a celebrity like him living—a tall, fancy building, with a huge garage and all sorts of high-tech keycard systems. 

“Wow,” Yukhei murmurs as he steps out of the car, “It’s so fancy.”

“Uh-huh.” Baekhyun grins, proud. “Come on, don’t you want to see the  _ bedroom _ ?” He crooks his finger, and trots towards the elevator smugly. This—the flirting, the sexual tension—it’s Baekhyun’s domain. Yukhei might have the upper hand when it comes to romance, maybe, but Baekhyun is the one that can make Yukhei fall to his knees with just a lick of his lips. 

The trip from the garage to Baekhyun’s apartment is a blur, mostly because Baekhyun spends half of it trying to shove his tongue into Yukhei’s mouth (not that Yukhei minds). 

“You look so sexy in that pink sweater,” Baekhyun gasps between kisses, as the elevator doors open onto his floor. “Don’t know why, but I love it.” He runs a hand up Yukhei’s chest, and grasps his hand, tugging him into the hallway. “My apartment’s here,” he announces, turning a corner and fumbling for his keys. Yukhei just lets himself be dragged around, mostly just taking in his surroundings—he’s in a real celebrity’s apartment building, after all. 

When Baekhyun finally gets the door open, Yukhei tries to get a look around, but Baekhyun is already yanking him in a new direction. “Bedroom’s this way,” he says. “You can get a tour later.” “You’ve got a very nice home,” Yukhei says, trying to crane his neck to look at the kitchen, despite the fact that Baekhyun is already shoving him through the bedroom entrance with gusto.

“Thanks. Take your sweater off,” Baekhyun demands, closing the door behind him. Yukhei, always instantly obedient, and also full of energy and passion for getting his dick wet at whatever possible cost, complies, yanking the pink sweater over his head. He gently folds it, and sets it on Baekhyun’s dresser, right as Baekhyun pulls off his own suit jacket and chucks it across the room, where it lands in a crumpled pile on the floor.    
Baekhyun practically leaps across the room, grabbing onto Yukhei’s shoulders and pushing him down so that he falls back onto Baekhyun’s bed. Pressing sloppy kisses along Yukhei’s jawline and undoing the buttons on his undershirt, Baekhyun asks, in a husky whisper, “What do you want?”

“Whatever you want,” Yukhei replies, breathless. It feels like it’s been forever since that night in New York, and Yukhei really doesn’t care what Baekhyun wants to do with him—as long as he’s doing it with Baekhyun. 

“Well…” Baekhyun pops the last button on Yukhei’s shirt open, exposing his whole chest. He circles his thumb around Yukhei’s nipple, relishing in the way he twitches under him. “There’s something I wanted to try. Something special for the birthday boy.” 

“You don’t have to do anything for me,” Yukhei replies, voice softening. “Are you sure you don’t just want me to fuck you?”

“It’s your birthday. Besides,” Baekhyun grins, a little evilly, “I’m not even sure if you’ll like my special thing.”

Yukhei carefully puts a hand on Baekhyun’s cheek. “I’m down to try anything,” he says, firm. “If it’s with you.”

“Okay.” Baekhyun sits up. “I need you to get undressed, then. But keep the necklace on.”

Nodding feverently, Yukhei immediately starts unbuttoning his pants. Meanwhile, Baekhyun searches through a couple drawers in his bedside table until he finds what he’s been looking for—a bottle of lube. 

Yukhei sits on the bed, patiently, holding a pillow over his hard-on, mostly out of embarrassment, watching as Baekhyun sets a box of condoms to the side, and runs to the bathroom to quickly wash his hands.

“What exactly are we doing, Baekhyun?” Yukhei calls out. 

Baekhyun steps out of the bathroom, lube bottle in hand. “Have you ever had anything up your ass, Yukhei?”

Yukhei feels like he can hear the record scratch noise in his brain. “What?”

Baekhyun’s signature self-satisfied little smirk returns to his face. “We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to.” He hops onto the bed. “But I thought it might be fun to try.” Crawling forward, he cages Yukhei in with his arms, and kisses him, slow and sweet. “I just want to blow you,” he clarifies, pulling the pillow from Yukhei’s arms, “and maybe try putting a finger or two up your ass.”   
Yukhei raises his eyebrows, and thinks for a second. He’s never really put anything… up there, despite one or two unfortunate and unsuccessful masturbation sessions, and he’s never really thought about it. But Baekhyun seems to really, really,  _ really,  _ enjoy taking it up the ass—so it can’t be half bad. Also, when it comes to Baekhyun, there’s just something exciting in getting to try something new, and he knows Baekhyun is patient and loving, a lot more than he lets on, and so if he doesn’t end up liking it, they can always do something else.

“Okay,” he says. “Sure.” 

Baekhyun bites his lip and smiles, seemingly proud of himself. “Lie down on your back,” he orders, “and then tuck this pillow under your ass.” As Yukhei complies, Baekhyun rolls up his sleeves and uncaps the lube. “Get ready for the greatest experience of your life. Hopefully.” 

Watching Baekhyun be the one squirting lube onto his fingers is slightly jarring, like Yukhei’s in uncertain territory—though everything with Baekhyun feels like uncertain territory, really. 

“One of these days,” Baekhyun hums, “I’ll fuck you. But we’re not quite there yet.” Yukhei tries to imagine what Baekhyun topping him would even be like, and his brain flatlines. The idea of it is a lot more appealing than he thought, but he supposes that’s a thought for another day. “You good?” Baekhyun asks, and he runs a hand down Yukhei’s leg reassuringly.

“I’m good,” Yukhei says, and he takes a deep breath in. “A little nervous, but I’m good. Also, um, my ass is clean. If you were worried about that.”

Baekhyun barks out a laugh. “Thanks, babe.” Gently, he grasps Yukhei’s dick, running his hand up and down it. At just the feeling of someone else’s skin touching his dick, Yukhei instantly lets out a broken moan. 

“Been a while, huh?” Baekhyun purrs, rubbing his thumb over the head of his cock. 

Yukhei fists the bedsheets between his fingers. “Shut up,” he groans. “It’s been a while for you too.”

“Hm. Good point,” remarks Baekhyun, pleased with himself. “Alright, I’m going to start now.” Suddenly, Yukhei feels a cold, lubed up finger, searching Where No Man Has Gone Before, and circling his asshole. 

“Woah,” he gasps. “That’s weird.” 

“It’s only going to get weirder,” Baekhyun says. “Welcome to my world.” He prods one of his delicate fingers inside Yukhei’s ass, and Yukhei involuntarily lets out a gasp. It’s not bad, just  _ strange.  _

“My fingers aren’t as long as yours,” Baekhyun remarks, “But I do know my way around an asshole.”   
“What am I supposed to do with that information!” Yukhei whines. Baekhyun grins, and wiggles his finger, slowly, carefully, stretching Yukhei out. The stretch, the feeling of something foreign inside him, it should feel odd, but there’s a weird sort of pleasure to it. But, of course, because Baekhyun wants to  _ kill  _ him, right as he slides a second finger in next to the first, he also leans down and licks along the length of Yukhei’s dick.  _ Oh God,  _ Yukhei thinks. He’d been so focused on the fingers-in-the-ass thing, that he’d completely forgotten Baekhyun was also going to suck his dick. He’s doomed.

Baekhyun starts to scissor his fingers, right as he encloses his lips around the tip of his dick, and Yukhei makes a high pitched noise he didn’t even know he was capable of making. The combined feeling of the stretch of Baekhyun’s fingers slowly opening him up and the way Baekhyun’s tongue is swirling over the head of his dick is kind of amazing, and Yukhei is wondering why they don’t do this all the time, honestly, or why he doesn’t suck Baekhyun’s dick while fingering him, because it’s kind of genius. It doesn’t help that Baekhyun is a champion dick-sucker, practically built for it with that stupidly big mouth and lack of gag reflex. He starts to take Yukhei’s length deeper into his mouth with a practiced ease, and Yukhei lets himself moan—they’re alone, in Baekhyun’s apartment, after all. No one’s going to bother them, and Baekhyun’s always told Yukhei he likes all the little noises he makes during sex. As his thighs shake, he places a hand on Baekhyun’s head, gripping his hair, just a bit, the way he likes, and Baekhyun lets out an appreciative noise of acknowledgement, the vibrations only making Yukhei feel more like he might just come right there and then. 

He almost forgets the fingers, for a second, until suddenly, Baekhyun crooks them just right, hitting  _ something  _ that makes Yukhei let out a yelp as pleasure shoots all the way up his spine. 

“Oh m’God—fuck—what was that,” he gasps out, almost kneeing Baekhyun in the face with the way his legs tremble. 

Baekhyun responds by curling his fingers again, and Yukhei feels like he really might die—it’s an entirely different kind of pleasure than the one he’s used to, but it’s really fucking amazing, and combined with Baekhyun taking his dick practically balls-deep in his mouth, it feels like heaven. 

“Holy shit,” Yukhei whines as Baekhyun starts to thrust his fingers more roughly, moving his head up and down along Yukhei’s length. “Is this how you feel all the time?  _ Fuck. _ ” He covers his face with a hand, because he’s pretty sure if he looks at how well Baekhyun is taking his dick in his mouth, he’ll come instantly.    
Baekhyun swirls his tongue along the tip again, and pulls his mouth all the way off Yukhei’s dick, still not relenting from twisting his fingers against Yukhei’s inner walls. Yukhei whimpers at the loss of the warmth of Baekhyun’s mouth, but he’s honestly pretty distracted by the way Baekhyun is fucking  _ fingerblasting  _ him right now with his stupid slender little fingers, and he can’t really think, at all, too busy shaking and groaning and making incoherent noises. 

“Enjoying yourself?” Baekhyun says, voice silky even after taking Yukhei’s dick down his throat. He languidly runs his hand along Yukhei’s dick again, the spit all over it making his hand glide easier. 

“It’s so good, Baekhyun,” Yukhei cries, right as Baekhyun presses against that one spot inside him that makes him feel like he’s seeing stars again. “T-this is what it’s like for you?” 

Baekhyun nonchalantly slides a third finger into Yukhei’s hole, which is stretched enough to take it at this point. “It’s even better for me,” he replies, voice low. “Because of those huge fucking fingers of yours. I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself, baby.” 

The petname makes Yukhei involuntarily moan, and he shakes his hips, trying to fuck himself back on Baekhyun’s fingers a little. Meanwhile, Baekhyun suddenly takes Yukhei’s dick into his mouth again, so deep that Yukhei swears he feels it hit the back of Baekhyun’s throat. He feels insanely close, like he’s teetering on the edge, and he doesn’t know whether he should ride against Baekhyun’s fingers or rut into his mouth—the pleasure, it’s all too much, like Baekhyun is entirely enveloping him and him only, 

“Baekhyun.” He curls his toes, hand trembling where it holds onto Baekhyun’s hair for dear life. “I’m close, I’m so close, Baekhyun, please, can I come, please, Baekhyun—” 

Baekhyun looks at him, eyes watering a little bit, probably from taking Yukhei’s cock so deep down his throat, and he nods, starting to thrust his fingers a little harder. It feels like he’s  _ forcing  _ the orgasm out of Yukhei, the way he relentlessly rubs against Yukhei’s prostate, sucking on his dick like it’s the air he breathes.

Yukhei’s orgasm hits like a truck, and Baekhyun pulls back just as he does, like he can sense it. (He probably can. After this experience, Yukhei is pretty sure Baekhyun is a magical sex god.) His vision blurs, and for a second, he only sees white, before he’s coming, all over Baekhyun’s face and a bit on Baekhyun’s very nice shirt—oh well. He gasps, realizing, first of all, that he just jizzed all over his new boyfriend’s face, and second of all, the reason he jizzed all over his boyfriend’s face is because he just got his prostate finger-fucked to hell and back. As he comes back down to earth, he blinks, staring at Baekhyun, who is staring back at him, face covered in come, and confusedly enough, is smiling like this is the most joyful experience of his life. 

“I’m so sorry,” Yukhei croaks, sitting up a little. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry.” 

Baekhyun reaches over, grabbing a tissue from the bed stand, and starts to wipe off his face, casually, like he just got spaghetti sauce on it or something. 

“What are you sorry for?” he says. “That was amazing.”

“But—I just came on your face,” Yukhei says, ashamed. “That’s gross.”   
“You think you’re the first guy to bust a nut on my face?” scoffs Baekhyun. “You’re not special.” Yukhei doesn’t even know how to begin to comprehend that, so instead, he sits up a little, trying to clear his head after just having possibly the most mind-blowing orgasm of his life. Baekhyun licks around his lips and traces a finger in-between Yukhei’s pectorals. “Did you enjoy it? The getting fingered.” 

“Very much,” Yukhei says, voice feeling worn out, like he was the one just deepthroating a dick. “I didn’t know it felt like that. That’s how it is for you?”

“Uh-huh,” Baekhyun says, teasing. “You see why I like it so much?”

“I um—I—Can we go again? Not the fingering, just the—you know. Sex.” Yukhei swears he can already feeling his dick twitch with interest at the thought of fingering Baekhyun, and also, he’s concerned, because Baekhyun hasn’t got an opportunity to come yet tonight. 

“Already?” Baekhyun chuckles. 

“I want you to feel good, too.” Yukhei places a firm hand on Baekhyun’s shoulder, and pulls him in for a kiss, ignoring that his mouth might taste like his own nut. Even if it does, it’s worth it for getting to kiss Baekhyun, who sighs and languidly kisses him back. 

“You don’t have to worry about me tonight,” Baekhyun insists, fondly playing with the chain around Yukhei’s neck. “It’s your birthday.”

“Yeah, but my dick’s already getting hard again,” Yukhei pouts. “Let me fuck you, Baek, please?”

“If you insist,” Baekhyun says. “What do you want me to do? I’ll do anything. Any position. As freaky as you need. Make your special requests, birthday boy.”

Yukhei stares at Baekhyun, trying to parse his brain for what he even wants. The truth is, they’ve done a lot of what at least Yukhei considers to be  _ freaky.  _

“Actually… uh…” Yukhei trails off, embarrassed. 

Baekhyun, currently unbuttoning his shirt, raises an eyebrow. “Don’t be shy. Anything you want.” 

“Well.... I know you think it’s boring… but I just sort of want to do missionary? I want to see your face.” Humiliated, Yukhei puts his face in his hands. “Sorry. It’s stupid.”

Baekhyun looks astounded. “I’m offering you the opportunity do any wild sex position with me, and you want to do… missionary?” 

“Yes?” Yukhei says, voice small. 

Baekhyun grabs onto Yukhei’s cheeks. “You’re so gross. You want to have  _ missionary sex _ ? With  _ me _ ?” 

“Yes…?” 

“I love you, you stupid lovesick asshole,” says Baekhyun, pulling him into another kiss. “Let’s do it. Let’s do your stupid lovey-dovey-married-couple missionary sex.”

Yukhei lets Baekhyun roam hands over his body, still stunned. “I thought you hated missionary. You said it was boring.”

“I do,” Baekhyun remarks, snarky as always. “But not with you. Missionary’s too… vulnerable,” he mutters. “But if it’s you, it’s okay.” 

Yukhei swallows. “You’re really okay with it?”

“If you’re okay with not getting to see me on all fours for you, sure.” Baekhyun looks down at Yukhei’s crotch, and chokes. “Jesus, you’re hard already?”   
“I haven’t had any for months,” Yukhei gripes. “Leave me alone!”   
“So eager for me.” Baekhyun ghosts his fingertips along his length, seemingly pleased at the desperate noises Yukhei lets out in response. “Sensitive, too.” He pulls his hand back and undoes his pants, sliding them off, shaking his shirt off too. He leaves his necklace on, and it makes Yukhei’s heart skip—it’s a little reminder that this isn’t just another random tryst born from sexual tension and desperation. Now, Baekhyun is  _ his.  _ Just his. 

He scoots to the side, and helps guide Baekhyun so that he’s lying, back to the bed, under him. Finding the lube on the bedside table where Baekhyun left it earlier, he squeezes some onto his fingers. This is a lot more familiar, comfortable territory for the two of them. Yukhei doesn’t really think he prefers one or the other—he kind of likes everything, as long as it’s with Baekhyun. Baekhyun looks up at him, his eyes unreadable. Yukhei’s never really been able to tell what Baekhyun’s thinking, ever. It’s the appeal of Baekhyun—he draws you in, and you get lost in him, in understanding him, in wanting him to be yours, forever.  _ Forever with Baekhyun sounds pretty nice _ , Yukhei thinks to himself wistfully, and he almost forgets that the man himself is lying under him, naked, waiting for Yukhei to put his fingers up his ass. 

“Stop staring at me like that,” Baekhyun groans. “I’m fucking horny, please.”

Flustered, Yukhei kisses right at Baekhyun’s collarbone. “Sorry, sorry.” He lowers his hand between Baekhyun’s legs with practiced ease, and pushes his middle finger in past the tight ring of muscle there. It slides in easier than he thought, and Baekhyun’s sharp inhale tells him he’s doing well.

“Missed this,” Baekhyun says, voice straining, despite still trying to maintain its usual sensual lilt. “Missed your fingers, so much.” 

Yukhei takes a lot more care this time with opening Baekhyun up this time, trying to think about what Baekhyun did to  _ him  _ that felt good. He searches, trying to find Baekhyun’s prostate with the same ease Baekhyun found his. When he presses the pad of his finger against Baekhyun’s insides and Baekhyun instantly lets out a drawn-out whine, he knows he’s located what he was looking for. He circles that spot, sliding in another finger, then another, Baekhyun squirming underneath him. It’s amazing to watch sometimes, how bossy Baekhyun can be one second, and how whiny and needy he can be the next. 

“I’m stretched enough,” Baekhyun heaves. “Please, I just need your dick in me, please—”   
“Are you sure?” Yukhei spreads his fingers, watching Baekhyun practically convulse underneath him, and he leans in, kissing soft and slow along the skin of Baekhyun’s neck. 

“Yes, yes, yes, please, you know I like the burn, please, I need it,” Baekhyun says, reaching up to dig his fingers into Yukhei’s back. “I haven’t stopped thinking about it all fucking night, all month, since November, even. Want it so bad.”

“Okay, okay,” Yukhei reassures, curling his fingers one more time, before slowly pulling them out of Baekhyun, who makes some incoherent complaint about the loss.    
Not forgetting his promise to Ten, Yukhei grabs the condom package, pulling one out and quickly checking the expiration date (you never know). 

Baekhyun slaps his leg. “No condom,” he says, “I know I got the box out, but I changed my mind.” 

Yukhei looks at him, confused. “Safety first?” Yukhei says.

“No, I haven’t been with anyone since you, please. I want to feel you, and I… I trust you. If you’re okay with it.” 

“I’m very okay with it,” Yukhei replies, putting the condom back. “Can I—can I come inside?”

“God, please,” Baekhyun practically begs. “Please, just put it in already. I don’t care where you come.”

With his hands on Baekhyun’s hips, Yukhei lines the tip of his dick up with Baekhyun’s entrance, and in one slow movement, pushes his way in. The tight heat of Baekhyun’s body enveloping him is instantly incredible, and his head falls down, letting out a low moan at the same time Baekhyun makes a garbled noise of his own. 

“Is it okay?” he asks, hoarsely, just wanting to make sure Baekhyun feels alright.

“Is it  _ okay _ ?” Baekhyun returns, voice straining. “It’s—s’fuck—it’s amazing. Fuck, I’m so fucking full, I forgot how big you were, can you start moving, for the love of God—"

Yukhei nods, and he draws back his hips, then slams forward again. Baekhyun is tight, but not so tight that he can’t move, and he soon finds a comfortable pace, Baekhyun mewling underneath him. It feels pretty amazing, and Baekhyun is so wrong about missionary being boring, because at this angle, he can see all of Baekhyun’s beautiful face, his fluttering eyelashes and the way his lips part to catch his breath. He can bite at Baekhyun’s neck, his collarbones, his shoulders, appreciate him for all he’s worth. It’s  _ perfect,  _ Baekhyun is just perfect, and Yukhei loves him more than the world, he thinks, but he’d never say that out loud, at least not yet. 

Baekhyun wraps his legs around Yukhei’s back, tightening around him as if to pull him closer, to encourage him to go deeper. Yukhei grips Baekhyun’s sides, trying to fuck into Baekhyun as deep as his dick can go, and attempts to angle his thrusts so that he can scrape along Baekhyun’s prostate. It appears to work, because Baekhyun’s many incomprehensible noises get even louder, and Yukhei grins, feeling oddly proud of himself.

Baekhyun, even while in the middle of being fucked, still finds the time to roll his eyes, and so in response, Yukhei kisses him for the thousandth time, taking one hand and finding one of Baekhyun’s. As their lips messily slide together, he interlaces their fingers, so that they’re holding hands, and Baekhyun makes a surprised noise against Yukhei’s mouth. Yukhei slows his thrusts, tries to be more passionate and slow, and his heart skips a beat when Baekhyun squeezes their hands together even tighter. 

“You’re so corny, Xuxi,” Baekhyun whispers, like he doesn’t want anyone else to hear.

“Sorry,” Yukhei mutters, still slowly fucking into Baekhyun. “I like you a lot.”

“I suppose I like you too,” Baekhyun grunts, breath hitching when Yukhei spears against his prostate again. His legs tighten around Yukhei’s back, and he still doesn’t let go of his hand. Hair plastered against his face, gold chain lying against his chest, ribs rising and falling as he breathes, he looks like an angel. Like the love of Yukhei’s life. 

“I’m lucky I found you,” Yukhei says, and he’d feel a little embarrassed if his brain capacity wasn’t mostly overtaken with thinking about how Baekhyun’s ass is squeezing on his dick.

Baekhyun groans, half from pleasure and half from annoyance with Yukhei’s sappiness. “God. You’re so much.” He pulls their clasped hands to his face, and kisses Yukhei’s knuckles. “I’m lucky I found you too,” he says, without any qualifier or addendum or sarcastic tone to his voice. Yukhei’s heart spins and dances in his chest, and he starts to speed up again with his movements.

“Are you close?” he says, voice tender and low.

Baekhyun laughs, breathless. “Maybe if you pick up the pace, big boy.”   
Yukhei complies, quickly, starting to really snap his hips forward. He’s close himself, but he doesn’t want to come too soon, so he tries his best to hold himself back, focusing on giving it to Baekhyun hard and fast. He lets go of his hand in favor of holding onto his waist, practically moving him in time with his thrusts.    
“Fuck,” Baekhyun lets out, “That’s it, that’s it, shit—” He reaches down, and grabs onto his own untouched dick, shaking hand tugging on it a few times. “I’m gonna—” he says, voice high pitched and desperate, and all of a sudden—he’s coming, shaking on Yukhei’s dick. Yukhei fucks him through it, slow, watching as Baekhyun quivers and moans and rolls his eyes back and tightens his legs around Yukhei’s back, until he comes down, limply lying back. 

“Come on,” he murmurs. “Xuxi, use me to come,” 

Yukhei complies—it only takes a few more sloppy thrusts, Baekhyun moaning underneath him from the overstimulation, for him to spill inside of Baekhyun, warm and wet and strangely comforting. He falls forward, face burying in Baekhyun’s neck, trying to catch his breath. 

“Holy shit,” he says, muffled by where he’s pressed against Baekhyun.   
Baekhyun finds Yukhei’s hand, and grips it in his. “Holy shit, indeed.” His thumb rubs circles against Yukhei’s knuckles, and Yukhei feels so loved, so soft, so happy to be here, in this moment, with Baekhyun.

“How would you rate our first sexual experience as boyfriends?” he says into Baekhyun’s neck. 

“Excellent,” says Baekhyun, and he uses his spare hand to pet Yukhei’s hair. “Can’t believe you let me to finger you.”

“I’d do it again,” Yukhei replies, content to just lie here, even if he’s naked and Baekhyun’s lower half is covered in come. “Hey…” he whispers. “Can I stay the night?”  _ And maybe, can I stay with you forever,  _ he thinks. 

“Of course. Come on, let’s get cleaned up.” 

“Mmm. But I wanna just lie here.” Yukhei kisses at his neck, again.

“Well, just for a bit then,” Baekhyun says. “Hey, from now on, you’re always welcome here, you know? I’ll get you a key.”

“Really?”

“Of course.” A pause. “Happy birthday, Yukhei. I hope it was a good one.”   
“It was,” Yukhei sighs, pleased, and he closes his eyes. 

For the first time in a long time, he feels complete.

**Author's Note:**

> [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/lesyebin) [twitter](https://twitter.com/pristinbian)


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